Tuesday, March 4, 2008

My newest slaves

Hello again. Lovely to be back, I've finally succeeded in adding my paper bag to the Typist's RSS feed homepage which will hopefully encourage her to type for me more often.

Little update on taking over the world:
  1. New Slaves - I'm happy to announce that I've acquired two new slaves and a lovely new house to add to my territory. They, of course, still think that they are independent and own the home that we're all living in but I just let them think that since it makes them happy. I've already trained the male to feed me in between the regular feedings my primary male slave gives me so I'm no longer prone to bouts of whining hunger. The new female is posing more of a problem, however. She hasn't yet been trained that the middle of the hallway is for CATS ONLY and so sometimes walks there. Last week she made the large error of not looking where she was going as she walked on the forbidden passage and stepped on me. I do, however, think that the punishment I dealt her of the silent treatment worked as she now is very careful about her feet. Just yesterday I took her off punishment and allowed her to play with me again.
  2. New Internet $$$$ plan - I've been spending much of my time training my typist in internet strategies and SEO techniques. This will, I hope, prove very successful as I move away from the Squidoo internet scheme and onto a full-fledged internet takeover (aka marketing) scheme so as to conquer the world through that. Watch as I come out with cool new things....
So I continue the pursuit! I will HAVE THE WORLD!!!!!!
but first, I must bathe myself as the human just insisted on touching me.